I reckon it’s about time to rebel against the screw-faced success of the ambition coalition
I’m on a mission now
It doesn’t cost you anything to smile once in a while
But that’s probably the issue right there, isn’t it?
There’s no value in it
Likely I’ll never see a tooth cuz I’m a nobody, me
But truthfully everybody is somebody so you should fix your face and do your job, you bloody knob
But that’s not the way that they like to play
In the game of the shady ambition coalition
No it isn’t
“Oh my god, babes, I love your hair!”
No you don’t – you hate it
You told me it looks like a bird’s about to fly over and regurgitate fish guts for the babies it just laid in there
It’s ridiculous hair
Is what I should’ve said, to be fair
Cuz now that she’s heard what he said, unchallenged, he’s in, isn’t he, you see
Foot in the door, nose up in a butt
But you know what? She loves it a lot because she can rinse him too
Next time she drops a giant career poo she needn’t run to the loo
She’s got a handy human arse wipe poised and at the ready
Locked into position, an ambition coalition
I’ll tell you now though
Bottom and bench won’t rest all too comfortably
Because sitting at their side is a curmudgeon like me
And we can see all the way through the murky poo
We’re an elephant army
We’ll not forget and so they will inevitably regret
The shady ways of the backdoor ambition coalition
“I met so and so a few years ago, but I didn’t bother to say hello because he wasn’t somebody then, you know?”
Yeah, I do know, actually
Because I was there too
And just like so and so I didn’t get a chance to talk to you
Funny is that, because at the time I just thought you were twat
And here all these years later, I find out I was right
I rarely ever get it right!
That is funny
And then we get on to the money
You’re happy to get paid to do fuck all
And the less you do the more you want
Because in all the butts you’ve sniffed, the more leverage you whiffed
Now I’m starting to feel a little bit miffed at the injustice of this
So I’d like to recruit for my mission and take down the ambition coalition
Who’s with me?
You? You?
There’s more of us than there are of them, believe me, it’s true
What’s all this you’re saying about high grounds and morals?
They’re resting on false laurels – it’s time to take them down!
To what end?
To justice!
And fairness
To decency in people
Not the misappropriated Tory story of skivers and strivers
Just the calling out of bullshit
That’s the grit of it
Isn’t it?
When the intricacy of decency infiltrates the complexity of the ambition coalition we win
Me and you and our elephant crew out to do what’s right and true
We shouldn’t have to play this shady game if we don’t want to
It’s not the only way
Who at the top would honestly say that the creation of the frenemy entity is conducive to success?
Because it’s not, it’s a mess
It’s twisted and riddled with distrust and opportunism
Paranoid conversations leading to the next defiance alliance
Watching your back because the elephants you climbed over to get ahead are still there standing behind you
Watching you
They know you and what you do
Yet quietly they stand
But you dare not raise a hand to dismiss this silent witness
Because when the elephants speak, when the elephants mobilise
When the elephants stampede
They will indeed destroy you and your ivory tower
But the truth is, they never wanted to you to cower
It was your thirst for power that enabled the creation of the present situation
Now I’m thinking it’s about time for a change, that’s all
This elephant right here has had enough
Now, I can’t speak for rest of my herd, but I will raise my lone tusk and call you out on your bullshit
False claim
Bullshit – here’s what happened
Declaration of untruth
Bullshit – this is how it went down
My identification of your insecurity…
Well, that seems to me to be a crux in this issue
I won’t hand you a tissue cuz I’m not your friend, but I’m not your enemy either
We can work through this thing together,
You can stop that blag, drop the pout and the fake swag
No, no, you don’t need to mount me for assistance in any instance
Let’s try this thing another way, ok
Grab onto my tail and let’s get to work
Lets try this thing the elephant way
And this elephant ain’t playin’ – that’s all I’m really sayin’